Best Lifetime Movie Titles Ever

Lifetime movies: what’s not to love?  The Queen has a major cheese fetish, and adores anything that is unapologetically, shark-jumpingly Over the Top (it’s the flaming gay man in me).  Here’s my Top 20 Lifetime movie titles:

Baby Monitor: Sound of Fear

Touching Wild Horses

Mother, May I Sleep With Danger

The Advocate’s Devil

A Fare to Remember

Cradle of Lies

Crimes of Passion: She Woke Up Pregnant

Do You  Know the Muffin Man?

Mother Trucker: The Diana Kilmury Story

Sexual Advances

Sleep, Baby, Sleep

Single White Female 2: The Psycho

Terror In The Mall

The Lady Forgets

Trapped In A Purple Haze

To Be Fat Like Me

These Old Broads

The Whereabouts of Jenny

Why I Wore Lipstick To My Mastectomy

Because Mommy Works

~ by lewdandlascivious on June 25, 2007.

5 Responses to “Best Lifetime Movie Titles Ever”

  1. Okay, girl. I got some for you:

    Love, Honor, and Obey: The Last Maffia Marraige (Starring Nancy McKeon, to boot)

    A Date with Darkness: The Trial and Capture of Andrew Luster

    Hit-Woman: Double Edge (Starring Susan Lucci. Come on, now)

    Never Say Never: The Diedra Hall Story (Did she not go on to STAR in several Lifetime movies?)

    The Stranger Besides Me (which is only good because of its grammatical shortcoming …)

    Without a Kiss Goodbye: AKA Falsely Accused (Seriously? AKA is part of the title? And what about not kissing someone goodbye resembles being falsely accused, anyhow?)

    Bump in the Night

    Down Will Come Baby

    I Posed for Playboy

    Thicker Than Water (What isn’t?)

    The Queen of Mean: The Story of Leona Helmsley

    And the best across all the land:

    Hell on Heels: The Battle of Mary Kay (Starring Shirley MacLaine and Shannen Doherty)

    BTW cute Myspace boy still emailing me. Whoopie.

  2. Play on, playa!

  3. The best fake ones we could come up with. By Alli and Jess.

    From Man to Monster: Invasion of the Werewolf Burglars

    Moment of Truth: When All the Chips are Downloaded (A Story of Internet Gambling Addiction)

    Breaking the Burka: Triumph of a Muslim Stripper

    Muddy Waters: One Woman’s Battle with Colon Cancer

    Can Your Daddy Come Out and Play?

    The Day I Lost My Face

    Sex on Wheels: The Story of a Parapalegic Madam

    Whores by Design: The World of Mail Order Brides

    Truckin’: Drive of Despair

    Can’t Nobody Come to the Party?

    I Seen What You Had Did

    My New Mommy is Prettier

    Brother, Don’t You Love Me?

    Devil in Pink Leather: The Seduction of Ricky Martin

    (Here’s a bonus for you Alli:)

    Adam and Even: A Wife’s Revenge

  4. And continued:

    Duck, Duck, Death

    Ace is High: The Terror of Teenage Tennis Fame

    Hickory, Dickory Death

    Simon Says You’re Dead

    Lorenzo’s Llamas: Genocide in the Himalayas

  5. My favorites:

    Mom at 16
    She’s Too Young
    Too Young to be a Dad

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